Letterman

It's been a while since I was able to stay awake late enough to watch Late Show, but I found this excerpt from the transcript of Bill O'Reilly's appearance amusing:

DAVE LETTERMAN, HOST, "THE LATE SHOW WITH DAVID LETTERMAN": How were your holidays? Good?

O'REILLY: I had a nice winter solstice, yes.

LETTERMAN: OK.

O'REILLY: You can't say Christmas.

LETTERMAN: You can't say Christmas? Why is that?

O'REILLY: Because it's politically incorrect. And we did a lot of reporting on this. And that was a big thing that we were doing leading up to the -- while you were in St. Bart's, we were leading up to the Christmas holiday by saying, "Hey, how come we can't say Christmas?

LETTERMAN: I wasn't aware that you couldn't say "Christmas." When did this happen?

O'REILLY: Sears-Kmart started it. They said, "No more Christmas. It's all Happy Holidays or Winter Solstice. I actually got a card from a friend of mine that said, "Have a blessed winter." I live in New York. You know what you can do with your blessed winter, you know what I'm talking about it? Are you with me, Dave?

LETTERMAN: I wasn't aware that this had happened.

O'REILLY: You weren't aware of the big, giant controversy over Christmas?

LETTERMAN: Well, I ignore stuff like that. It doesn't really affect me. I go ahead and do what I want to do. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year, Happy Hanukkah.

O'REILLY: Here's why it matters.

LETTERMAN: Yes.

O'REILLY: You with me on this?

LETTERMAN: Yes.

O'REILLY: OK. Ridgewood Elementary School in Dodgeville, Wisconsin. The song "Silent Night"? "Silent Night," you know? Knocked out the words and told the little kids to sing, "Cold in the night, no one in sight. Winter winds whine and bite. How I wish I was happy and warm, safe with my family out of the storm." They replaced the words to "Silent Night" with that.
Now, with all due respect, I even think the baby Jesus would say, "Give me a break." You know? You want another one?

LETTERMAN: No, but what -- I don't -- but what does this prove? It proves that community of...

O'REILLY: It proves there are pinheads at the Ridgewell Elementary School in Wisconsin. That's what it proves. Here's another one. You want another one, or are you bored with this?
LETTERMAN: I kind of think we should -- I mean, but isn't this the kind of thing where, like, once or twice every 20 years, somebody gets outraged and says, "Oh my God, we've got to put diapers on horses."